canna oil, dessert, edibles, recipe, Uncategorized

more is not always better! // single-serving peanut butter canna-balls

Let’s just get this ubiquitous sentence-starter over with on this very first post – As a vegan, I was frustrated by the lack of edible options in my neighborhood. I’m a Washingtonian born and raised, and this is well before weed was legal and every shop had every kind of oil infusion in a bottle. I knew a handful of, *ahem,* small-business owners, so cannabutter was readily available to me. That’s all well and good, but I needed options. No shame in this game, but can we go ahead and say that I was an adult at this point so that I don’t have to make the disclaimer that developing brains should not be playing with mind-altering substances? Great, let’s move on.

I did a fair share of research on the internet before my experimentation with oil began. I was overwhelmed by the conflicting information, the sometimes complicated methodology, and the terms with which I, as a dabbler in the canna-arts, was unfamiliar. The gist of what I learned at that time amounts to these points: THC adheres to fat, low-and-slow is the heat THC likes, and your oil is as good as the marijuana you use. Armed with coconut oil for its fabulously fatty properties and an eighth I was willing to risk, I slow cooked those suckers until the heap turned into an earthy forest-green that would have made Bob Ross smile.

I’m a perfectionist, but I’m also headstrong. And impatient. I don’t always weigh all the best options before I dive in. If I want something done, I’m going to do it myself, my way.

This, my friends, is how I knocked out my two best friends at my ex-boyfriend’s birthday party. The oil was most certainly infused with THC, and while I thought the amount of oil in my vegan funfetti birthday cake was reasonable enough to cut a slice per serving, it ended up being one of the most egregious misdirection I have ever given. Fortunately, the side effects wear off after a good night’s 10-12 hour rest.

I know I’m not alone in this. After all, cannabrownies still have chocolate in them, ya’ll! Of course you wanna eat that whole damn thing. Do not tell me to start with half – that nonsense is for children and weaklings.

Cut to you wondering why the key fob for your Ford Fiesta isn’t unlocking the front door of your apartment, and now you’re trying to adjust to life as a homeless person.

There is a solution, and it is wildly simple. So simple that it took me this long to arrive at it. You know when you have a really terrible bottle of vodka someone left at your New Year’s Eve party, but booze is money and you’re not gonna throw that shit away? What do you do? You dilute it.

The principle is the same for these easy, breezy cake truffles. They’re meant to buff up your treat’s volume with frosting so that you can indulge in a whole serving without passing out at a house party, on the trail, or wherever you like to consume your goods. If you made the edibles yourself, you could’ve diluted the amount of canna-oil or butter in the first place with traditional oil or butter. BUT YOU DIDN’T THINK OF THAT BEFORE AND WE CAN ONLY EVER DO OUR BEST, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

SINGLE-SERVING PEANUT BUTTER CANNA-BALLS
makes 16-20 servings

8-10 full-strength edibles, or 1 recipe full-strength baked-good edibles of choice (Cakes, brownies, whatever your poison. It’s best if you know how strong they already are for yourself or the people with whom you’ll be sharing. A little math is involved to figure out by how much you’re going to dilute your goods. If you crumble up 8 treats and come out with 20 truffles, your truffles will be about 60% less potent. See, you didn’t need college! You can do it!)

3/4 cup non-hydrogenated margarine, such as Earth Balance

1/3 cup peanut butter – preferably creamy, but crunchy will still yield tasty frosting!

1 1/2 tsp pure vanilla extract

1-2 cups powdered sugar

1-2 tablespoons non-dairy milk

1/3 cup cocoa powder, or more (for rolling)

  1. Spread parchment paper onto a baking sheet or a couple large plates. This will be your truffle assembly surface. Put cocoa powder into a small, shallow bowl.
  2. Cream your margarine in a stand mixer until fluffy.
  3. Add peanut butter and vanilla, and beat 1-2 minutes until creamy and smooth.
  4. Beat in sugar 1/2 cup at a time until frosting becomes very stiff.
  5. Add in non-dairy milk 1 tablespoon at a time until desired consistency is reached. For truffles, you want this frosting to be soft enough to blend into your baked good crumbs, yet thick enough to hold the crumbs together once chilled.
  6. Take your stand mixer bowl out of the mixer and crumble in the edibles. Honestly, the most consistent and efficient way to do this is with your clean, clean hands! Then you can start to fold in the crumbs into the frosting mixture, but I also like to work the mix with my hands once the crumbs are folded into it in order to achieve a relatively consistent “dough.”
  7. Use a tablespoon to scoop balls of dough from the bowl. The scoops themselves should be about 2 tablespoons. Roll in the palm of your hand.
  8. Dip the balls into cocoa powder bowl and roll around until lightly dusted. Place on baking sheet or plates.
  9. Place in fridge until frosting re-solidifies, about 20-30 minutes. Place all balls into a new, covered container and store in the fridge or freezer.
  10. Alternatively, you can dust the balls in powdered sugar, cinnamon sugar, or melted chocolate for really decadent truffles. You can even eat them plain, who cares. Whatever your little heart desires.

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